Lost In Translation

Well this is not at all what I had intended.  I had hoped that, when I persuaded the Convener to become a Blogger, that would be the end of it; but now it seems that I bear the responsibility of turning his idle Doric ramblings into something that everyone can understand.  This marks the interface between Diversity and Equality, however I must point out that there are occasions where no English equivalent is available for Doric vocabulary but I’ll do my best to maintain the sense (or nonsense!) of the text.  Here goes ……

“Nigel! Nigel! – come through to my office a minute”

“What’s up Convener?”

“It’s this thingymablog thing – it’s not working!”

“Not working Convener?”

“No – nobody understands a word I’m saying.  Here’s Rupert, being very kind about what I’m trying to do but the poor man’s not got the foggiest idea what I’m on about!”

“Oh dear, Convener”

“Oh dear precisely! – It was your blessed idea!!  What are we going to do?”

“Well Convener, I do agree that I should take some responsibility, but it seemed like such a good idea.  Perhaps I could tidy it up a bit – you know – take out some of the more unusual expressions?”

“Not on your Nellie, Nigel!”  ‘That’s the way I speak and I’m trying to communicate in my mother tongue”

“But Rupert’s right Convener.  There’s little point of trying to get a message out if it sounds like Greek to a large section of your intended audience.”

“Don’t mention the Greeks!  They’re in a right mess as well.  But we’ll have to do something.”

“Well maybe I could provide an alternative version – you know, on my own blog.”

“What? Have a Nigel’s blog as well?”

“Yes Convener”

“Not a bad idea - then when someone’s having a bit of difficulty with the Doric they can still get the message somewhere else.  A bit like having a Google Translate for Doric?

“Yes Convener”

“Well that should please Rupert – I hope he doesn’t bear a grudge.  Bear a grudge – Rupert – do you get it?”

“Unfortunately yes, Convener”